Our Christian Religious Knowledge (CRK) teacher promised that no one was going to pass her exams since students refused to attend her class claiming they already know the bible. She decided to give us 5 questions… Question No.1- When Jesus Christ walked on water, how many feet was the water? Akpos Answered – 2 feet. […]
↧
Akpos Joke: CRK Questions
↧
Akpos Joke: Missing Phone
Akpos got so high and was searching for his missing phone with the torchlight from the same phone he was looking for. His close friend, who was also high joined him in this serious search. After 2 hours of searching, his phone rang. He picked the call and quickly told the caller, “I’ll call you […]
↧
↧
Akpos Joke: USA
Akpos was doing his geography assignment with his dad… DAD: Akpos, which country is near to U.S.A? Akpos: I don’t know dad. FATHER: I will beat you today if you don’t answer my question, because during my own time in school, I knew everything and I answer any questions my dad throw at me correctly. […]
↧
Akpos Joke: Fuel Ticket
Attendant: Sir, but you are using a discounted ticket…. Akpos: Yes, any problem? Attendant: (aghast) But it is a ‘children discount’ ticket, Sir? Akpos: (unfazed) Oh, I recently converted to Christianity…. Attendant: (puzzled) So? Akpos: I am now a born-again CHILD of God.
↧
Funny Joke: Do you have a vagina?
A woman hears someone knock at the door. She opens to see and a man asks, “Do you have a vagina??” She slams the door in disgust. The next day she hears a knock, opens up and it’s the same man. He asks the same question the woman slams the door again. Her husband gets […]
↧
↧
Akpos Joke: At the Border
Akpos goes up to the Cotonou border on his bicycle. He had over his shoulders two large bags. The Customs Officer stopped him and asked, “What is inside the bags?” “Garri”, Akpos replied. The Customs Officer said, “Let me see. Come down from the bicycle.” The Customs Officer took the bags and ripped them apart. […]
↧
Girl’s Facebook Status Updates
A GIRL’S FACEBOOK STATUS UPDATES “Wow! I just found the love of my life… Nothing will ever stop me from loving my man?.” 14 DAYS LATER “Never make sum1 a priority when you’re just an option to them!” 2 DAYS LATER “I HATE love so much!” 3 DAYS LATER. “I’m happy to remain single and […]
↧
Akpos Joke: Horse and Zebra
TEACHER: Akpos, can you differentiate between a horse and a zebra? AKPOS: Yes sir. TEACHER: (brings a picture of a horse) Which one is this? AKPOS: It’s a horse, sir. TEACHER: Excellent! (now brings a Zebra) And which one is this? AKPOS: It’s still a horse sir, but now it’s wearing pyjamas.
↧
Nigerian Police and Their Wahala
Below are some of the Troubles You Face With Policemen on The Road… Why is your laptop bag empty, you want to steal a laptop and keep it in the bag abi? Oya, enter the motor! Oga, this your Range Rover Sport car is fine o. Oya, use it to hit that wall there let’s […]
↧
↧
Akpos Joke: Money Need
AKPOS: Kwame please, I’m going to be needing N100,000 from you… I promise to pay back with N120,000. KWAME: First of all, what do you need the money for? AKPOS: I want to buy an iPhone 6s for my ex on her birthday so as to win her back. KWAME: First, send me your psychiatric […]
↧
Akpos Joke: Polluting the air
Akpos farts (pollutes the air) in the classroom and his teacher gets really upset and throws him out. He goes and sits outside the class. The principal walks by and sees him sitting outside laughing. He asks, “Akpos, what are you doing outside sitting here laughing?” Akpos replies, “I farted in class and the teacher […]
↧
Akpos Joke: Hysterical
Akpos brings his best buddy home for dinner… unannounced at 7.30 pm after work. His wife begins screaming at him and his friend just sits and listens in. Wife: The dishes are not done, the house is a mess, there is no grocery and I can’t be bothered with cooking tonight! Why the hell did […]
↧
Funny Joke: Jealous Husband
HUSBAND: My wife where are you? WIFE: At home love. HUSBAND: Are you sure? WIFE: Yes. HUSBAND: Turn on the blender. WIFE: (turns blender on) reeereeeereeee HUSBAND: Ok my love goodbye. Another day HUSBAND: My wife where are you? WIFE: At home love HUSBAND: Are you sure? WIFE: Yes HUSBAND: Turn on the blender WIFE: […]
↧
↧
Funny Joke: Chicken and Goat
A chicken and a goat decided to take a walk. As they were walking, a car drove past them with speed and splashed some water on them. The chicken took offence and said, “Look at how they drive, like goats!” And the goat replied, “No wonder they die like chickens.”
↧
Akpos Joke: No Fishing
Akpos was sitting near a small pond with his fishing rod in the water. Then a man came to the Akpos… MAN: You are not allowed to fish in that pond. AKPOS: I’m not fishing, I’m teaching my worm how to swim.
↧
Funny Joke: Attractive
A woman came to her husband, feeling very happy and said, “Honey, at 50-year-old, one of your friends finds me so attractive.” The husband just smiled and said, “I won’t be surprised if it’s Kwame.” Wife in shock, “Yes, why?” The husband replies, “He deals in leftovers…”
↧
Funny Joke: To walk
Out of curiosity, I went to a church to take part in their prayer sessions. Whilst praying a member touched my shoulder and said: YOU WILL WALK! I did not understand him because I am not physically challenged. When I got out of the church believe me my motor bike had been stolen.
↧
↧
Akpos’ GCE Exams questions
GCE MATHEMATICS EXAM PAPER Time: 2Hrs 30MINS INSTRUCTIONS: ATTEMPT ALL QUESTIONS. ALL QUESTIONS CARRY EQUAL MARKS. You have dated a girl for 2 years, eventually she drops you for another guy. Calculate the percentage of time wasted. (20 marks) You bought a phone for your girlfriend and she gave it to another guy. Using trigonometric […]
↧
Joke: Horror woman
Patient: Dr please am I ugly? Doctor :“ you’re not ugly” Patient : But everybody says I’m ugly !” Doctor : “Listen , you are not ugly” Patient :“ I know I’m ugly ” Doctor : “You are a fine, strong looking man ” Patient : “ I’m a woman ” Doctor : Eiiiii!!, sorry […]
↧
Akpos and friends
Three friends died in a car crash, they went to heaven to an orientation. They were all asked, “When you are in your casket and friends and family are mourning you, what would you like to hear them say about you? The first guy Abraham said, “I would like to hear them say that I […]
↧